1. The Wall
This poem is an introduction to my poetic biography, this is the first poem of ten that, I believe, represent who I am. Please see my About page for the full series.
When I was young,
and I did'nt know
right from wrong.
An infant in the shadow
hidden against the wall.
Thumb between my lips.
In the living room,
The lights comforting grip,
From the lamp it resumes
on the table next to me.
This only form of comfort
inside iniquitys..dark room.
I was really very short;
where is the womb?
I'm stuck against the wall.
As I looked to my left...
I saw my brother,
I wished I was deaf.
There is my not so real father.
Suddenly the room shuddered...
The way was shaken,
as my brother...smack...;
flying across the room, abandoned.
The thud of his head, cracked;
violence can be such a tempest.
My back was against the wall.
The tears...the fears..poured,
and I don't feel very tall.
From my eyes and spirit it flowed;
such little strength, could it be mustered?
I was no match
to my... my not...so real father;
where was the escape hatch?
My brother, so angry at life and my mother;
for not being there.
Stop!...my not so real father.
Mom!...mommy!..where were you?
Please stop...this meanspirited step-father.
My back against the rampart;
what can create such a blackheart?
I am so glad...my brother
is still with me here..today.
I do love him, dearly,
for he will always be my way.
He will always be my big brother;
the start of totemism.
Written by Gary H.....March 22/1997
Revised 5/15/2005
P.S.: My brother passed away about 2 years ago,(2003) leaving behind the most loving wife and children with grandchildren. He loved them dearly. He contracted cancer from being a worker at the Nevada Test Site and his exposure to radiation.
Artists credit: "Breakthru" - by Jean-Paul Avisse
